


point of origin

by thisissirius



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Fear, Fire, Flashbacks, M/M, Mental Health Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-10
Updated: 2017-04-10
Packaged: 2018-10-17 09:05:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10590801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisissirius/pseuds/thisissirius
Summary: Robert hates fire.





	

**Author's Note:**

> written for lo and for everyone else who wanted robert trapped in a burning building :)

_Fire._

Robert _hates_ fire.

 _Breathe_.

It’s easier to think than to do, the air thick with smoke, and nowhere to go. He’s not even supposed to be here, he thinks hysterically, only spending the night because he was fighting with Aaron.

 _Aaron_.

The window in the spare room isn’t the biggest, but it’s enough that when he throws it open, gulping in lungfuls of air, he can breathe.

“Robert!”

Robert looks back over his shoulder, ignoring the shout, watching smoke curl through the edges of the door. He should have shoved something in there, maybe if he does it now it won’t matter and he can still get out, but what if it doesn’t help?

“Robert!”

Leaning out of the window, Robert sees Vic standing on the grass, clad only in her pyjamas and shoes, staring up at him with wide, round eyes. She looks terrified, like Robert feels, and he wants to reassure her.

His fingers are clutching the windowsill, nails digging hard into the wood. He swallows, chest tight with panic.

“Vic,” he says, voice barely above a whisper. She’s not going to hear it, but she doesn’t look away, keeps her eyes trained on him.

There’s the sound of footsteps on gravel, someone screaming, “I called the fire brigade,” and Robert sees Adam skid down the pathway, grabbing Vic around the shoulders.

“Babe,” he says, breathless.

Robert looks back, scrambles for the bed and something to stuff in the door. The smoke is thick and makes his throat ache, his eyes sting. Everything is screaming at him to _run_ but there’s nowhere for him to go and he can’t jump out of the window, he _can’t_.

“ROBERT!”

That voice he knows, that voice he _needs_.

“Aaron,” he says, choking on the word. Then, scrambling for the window, louder, “Aaron!”

As he peers down at the grass, he sees Aaron and Liv racing down the lane from the Mill, Aaron half-dressed and wild, eyes on Robert.

“Oh shit,” Aaron says, coming to a halt at the end of the path.

“Oh god, get him out,” Liv says, swept away from the path by someone Robert can’t make out in the dark.

Aaron tries to do just that, lunging for the door.

“No!” Robert screams, leaning further out of the window. “Adam stop him!”

The fire is already raging downstairs, Robert’s already tried to get out that way, and he doesn’t want Aaron to be anywhere near the house. It’s bad enough that he’s in the garden. Adam – and Cain, who Robert hadn’t even _seen_ – lunge forward and pull a struggling Aaron back.

“Are you mad?” Vic snaps, fists curled up against her chest. “You can’t get through, the stairs were blocked off!”

Aaron’s head tips, his eyes meeting Robert’s and Robert sees everything in his eyes; the fear, the guilt, the regret. It’s everything Robert wishes he could say, but he can’t, can’t move, can’t do much of anything.

Robert’s fingers clutch at the windowsill, the heat searing and unbearable. He doesn’t want to look back and see how much smoke is in the room; he can already feel it, in his throat, on his face.

“Robert,” Aaron says, loud enough that Robert can hear him over the roar of the fire. He’s clutching Vic’s hand in his, both of them as terrified as Robert feels. He wants to tell them that it will be okay, that everything will be fine, but the words won’t come. His whole body is frozen, like he’s never going to move again.

“Are they coming?” Adam shouts, back towards the lane.

Robert ignores him, body trembling as he stares down at Aaron. “I’m scared,” he says, the words torn from somewhere deep. He doesn’t want to admit to being weak, doesn’t want to admit to anything, but he has to say it, needs Aaron to know.

“I know, Rob, I know,” Aaron says, his own voice wavering.

There’s a bang somewhere across the landing and Robert instinctively ducks, feels the heat roll over him, the smoke thicken.

“Rob!”

_Vic_

“Robert!”

_Liv_

“ROBERT!”

_Aaron_

Robert lets out a sob, fingers scrambling for the windowsill. He hauls himself up, takes gulping breaths of fresh air and wishes he could swing himself out and just fall.

As he leans out, Liv’s fighting against Chas, trying to get down the path. Aaron and Vic are arguing, fighting over something, but it’s like the sound is coming from far away, tinny and out of focus. Robert blinks, every movement feeling heavy, thick and difficult.

“Robert?” Aaron again, eyes wide. “Robert are you okay?”

“I don’t feel so great,” Robert says, the words heavy on his tongue. He grips at the window, fingers sliding over something wet. “Aaron, I don’t wanna die.”

“You’re not,” Aaron starts, voice catching. Robert can barely hear him over the sound of Vic’s crying, Liv’s shouts. “You’re not going to _die_.”

“Mum did,” Robert says, and this time he looks at Vic, knows she’s been thinking the same thing. He wants to throw up, wants to forget he ever saw that barn fire, ever heard his mother’s screams taper off, forget the smell, the sounds, _everything_.

Except.

Except he _can’t_.

“It’s going to be okay,” Vic says, sounding more sure than she looks.

Robert wants to believe her. There’s no sound of sirens, nothing to signal help, he’s going to die, he’s not going to get out of here and he’s going to-

“We found something!”

There’s the sound of multiple footsteps on the lane, and Robert can make out four figures carrying something white between them.

“It’s one of the sheets from the B&B,” someone yells, and as they race toward the house, Robert can see that it’s Pete.

Bob, Jimmy and Cain follow him into the garden, all of them holding onto the sheet. They stretch it out over the garden, Adam, Aaron and Vic all shifting out of the way to give them room. Robert keeps his eyes on Aaron, doesn’t dare look away.

“You have to jump, mate,” Pete yells.

Robert shakes his head. “No.”

“Robert,” Cain starts, but Aaron’s voice cuts across him.

“I’ll be right here, babe,” Aaron says, leaning against the railings. He’s still got his eyes on Robert, holding his gaze. It’s the babe that lodges in Robert’s chest, the _babe_ that makes his heart stop skipping. “If I could jump with ya, you know I would.”

“You can, Rob,” Vic says, through her tears.

“Please,” Liv says, curled up against Chas.

Robert shudders, stares down at the sheet.

“Come on mate,” Cain says, eyes on the downstairs. “Don’t know how much longer we can stand here.”

 _I’m putting you in danger!_ Robert wants to yell. _I’m not worth it._

 _They think you are_. The voice in his head sounds suspiciously like his mother and Robert wonders if Jack would have ever _left_ her there, if she’d refused to come out if she had help, if someone could have-

Robert scrambles for the windowsill, hoists himself up. There’s not a lot of room for him to manoeuvre, and he can’t _see_ anymore, the smoke already spiralling up out of the window, but he manages to swing his legs out onto the windowsill, balanced precariously on the edge.

“Come on, Rob,” Bob says.

All of them, Aaron, Adam, Vic, _Liv_ , they’re all waiting. Robert’s terrified of dying, of _fire_ , but he’s even more terrified of the look on Aaron’s face, the fear that he’s going to lose Robert.

“It’s okay, Rob, come on,” Aaron says, his hand once again wrapped around Vic’s. Robert wants him desperately, wants to be _with_ him.

There’s a chorus of encouraging shouts, another bang from the house, and Robert sucks in a breath, closes his eyes and leaps, would rather take _fall from great height_ over _burn to death_.

There’s a whistle of wind-

The sound of his mother’s screams in his head-

The sound of Aaron’s panicked shouting-

The sound of Liv-

The sound of Aaron-

 _Aaron_ -

Robert lands with a thump, breath punched out of his chest, and sound seems to rush over him; shouts of victory, crying, sirens blaring in the background, Robert’s harsh breathing and crying.

The sheet is lowered, Robert feels solid ground beneath his body for a beat, and then hands are reaching for him, hauling him up and away from the house. He’s shaking, face wet, pain exploding in the back of his head, and he can’t breathe.

“It’s alright,” someone says in his ear. “Breathe.”

Robert’s eyes search out Aaron, but something slams into his chest, wrapping arms around his waist. _Liv_.

“I’m okay,” Robert lies, allows himself to press his cheek to her head. 

The fire pops and crackles behind them and Robert flinches, ducks away from Liv. He ignores her hurt expression, feels another hand slip into his.

“ _Rob_ ,” Vic says, still crying.

Robert wraps her in a hug, breathes against her temple. “I’m sorry,” he says, doesn’t know why he’s apologising.

“Don’t be stupid,” Vic says, pulling away. The sirens are blaring closer, Robert can see flashing out of the corner of his eye.

His chest feels tight, breaths coming harsh and difficult.

“I’m,” he starts, and then looks over Vic’s shoulder, sees Aaron staring at him. “Aaron.”

“ _Rob_ ,” Aaron says, shoving closer, wrapping Rob up in his arms. “Oh god, I thought-“

“I know,” Robert says, eyes burning with tears. He’s still shaking, feels Aaron’s hand rub up his back. It’s hard to breathe, hard to do _anything_ except let Aaron hold him, whisper, “It’s okay, it’s okay,” in his ear. “Aaron.”

“Alright, Rob,” Aaron says, kissing his temple. “I’m here.”

Robert’s fingers, still throbbing with pain, curl into Aaron’s hair, clutch at his t-shirt. His whole body aches, his head throbs, and every breath rattles his chest, but he can’t let go of Aaron, can’t stop breathing him in, touching him, wanting him.

There’s a crunch of tires on gravel, the blare of sirens and blue lights thrown over them.

“Robert,” someone says. “There’s an ambulance.”

“No,” Robert says, feels Aaron’s fingers tighten in his t-shirt.

Aaron kisses his temple, rubs a hand through his hair. “It’s alright. Let them check you out.”

Robert shakes his head, can’t make himself say it but doesn’t want Aaron to let him go. “I can’t-“

“Hey,” Aaron says, touching Robert’s face with soft, careful hands. “For me?”

Robert jumped for Aaron, still feels the phantom brush of fire, hears the distant sounds of his mother’s screams, but he focuses on Aaron’s face, on the relief and _love_ in his eyes, and finds himself nodding. He can’t let go of Aaron, can’t unlock his fingers from around Aaron’s t-shirt.

“It’s alright,” someone else says, Robert doesn’t recognise them, and there’s fingers on his, easing his grip. Aaron keeps his hands on Robert’s face, thumbs rubbing his cheeks, and Robert calms his breathing, doesn’t tear his eyes away from Aaron.

“Come on, son,” someone in green says, face kind.

“Aaron,” Robert says, blinking.

“Come on,” Aaron echoes, tugging Robert over to a waiting ambulance. “I’ll be right here.”

Robert refuses to look back, can already hear the sounds of fire crews, people shouting, relieved crying and shouts from the villagers. Instead, he focuses on Aaron, drowns out everything but Aaron’s hand in his, eyes on the back of Aaron’s head, the look on Aaron’s face as he presses Robert gently down into the ambulance.

Aaron crouches down in front of him, gives him a soft, relieved smile.

“Liv,” Robert says.

“Mum’s with her,” Aaron reassures him, squeezing his knee.

An oxygen mask is placed none-to-gently over Robert’s mouth and breathing gets a little easier, but he wants to tug it off, to wrap himself around Aaron and never let go.

“I love ya,” Aaron tells him, eyes wet.

“I love you too,” Robert tells him, through the mask, knows Aaron gets it from the soft look on his face, the gentle rub at Robert’s knee.

The doors to the ambulance slam shut, cutting Robert off from everything but Aaron, and he reaches for Aaron’s hand, grips it tight, and doesn’t let go.


End file.
